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The epic job…

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39 Comments


  1. wolfgame

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Recruiters have to be the **most** clueless people down the line in the IT hiring process. This includes hiring managers, HR, and the 90 year old lady who’s still at the front desk because it gets her out of the house.

    Reply

  2. brontide

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    You should apply and claim 10+ years experience since you worked with Mockingbird, the precursor to swift. They have already established that lying is necessary to get the job, might as well take it to the logical conclusion.

    Reply

  3. whoisearth

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    This annoys me from the flip side. SWIFT is also a global trading platform which is extremely complex and has been around for much longer. Imagine my frustration looking for jobs related to that SWIFT and all I get are millions of iphone app job postings.

    Reply

  4. designershoe

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Dont wanna be that guy, but likely referring to SWIFT as in the SWIFT NETWORK (Financial Messaging). Which has been around since the 70s..

    Reply

  5. wintremute

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Many companies do this to abuse the worker visa system. They post ridiculous requirements and insulting salaries, then claim they can find no Americans to do the job.

    Reply

  6. 86278_263789

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    “Excuses, excuses. We pride ourselves on hiring solution-oriented IT staff”

    Reply

  7. Redbeardthacoolio

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Apply with multiple people as a team with 8 years combined experience?

    Reply

  8. corbrat89

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Facebook headline: Millennials are ruining the Swift Programming Industry by not having enough experience.

    Reply

  9. got-trunks

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    congrats, YOU PASSED THE TEST! Here’s your ID and mechanical keyboard

    Reply

  10. KrlosParra

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    He should say that he has over 10 years of experience in swift since the recruiters have no fucking clue

    Reply

  11. Ocotopus_Shmoctopus

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Sooooo, why don’t you get 5 more years of experience and then use your time machine to travel back to when the job was posted and apply?????

    Reply

  12. Cley_Faye

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Just say that you worked full time on four projects in parallel, amounting to 12 years of experience.

    Reply

  13. Ayyno

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    See what you do is tell them that you’ll have 8 years Swift experience in about five years. Then say your know it’s a bit early for it but you managed to get a phone number for reference so they can confirm.

    Then give them their own phone number.

    Reply

  14. Ark161

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Welcome to I.T. that is managed by non-I.T. people…..terrifying really.

    Reply

  15. betsperanto

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    That’s 8 years CPU time, not wall-clock time. If you can’t parallelize then you’re not qualified.

    Reply

  16. ArmagedonOverdrive

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    So you’re saying you don’t have 8 years of experience in that area?

    Reply

  17. Daniel_USA

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    you got to have 100 years of computer training or get out!

    Reply

  18. Recalescent

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Why he doing job apps at a smash tournament

    Reply

  19. Jotebe

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Time Turner.

    Reply

  20. satanicpuppy

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    I always lie about that shit, if I have an appropriate amount of experience. Like, I have 20 years of programming experience, and I started working on language X a year ago, so I’ll say I have however many years of X is required because a whole year spent programming in a language at my level of experience is more than enough to learn the syntax and idiosyncrasies of a given language…Hell, if it’s derivative (like Groovy) then I’ll just read up on it before the interview and call it a day.

    Reply

  21. Dopecombatweasel

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    does taylor swift exp count?

    Reply

  22. bwoodcock

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    I interviewed for a Windows NT job where they asked for more experience on Windows NT than anybody other than the original developers could possibly have had. The HR lady didn’t understand even when I quoted years at her.

    Reply

  23. BrianBtheITguy

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    If you’re going to repost bullshit, I’ll repost the obvious reason why it’s bullshit…

    https://www.swift.com/

    Reply

  24. XEssentialCryIceIs

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Let me guess, it’s also an entry level job

    Reply

  25. Idi0tGenius

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    I am just gonna leave this here r/evilthoughts

    Reply

  26. I-baLL

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    You just need to work 100-120 hours a week and you+’ll end up with 8+ years of experience in just 3 years. Smart!

    Reply

  27. FedexSentMeAHead

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    So, if you worked 100hr/week for three years, wouldn’t that ‘technically’ qualify?

    Reply

  28. foxfai

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    They must be looking for the developer.

    Reply

  29. Binary_Omlet

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Ahhh, Swift jokes never miss.

    Reply

  30. EightBitBite

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    I’ve been using swift since red and blue bud.

    Reply

  31. 4FingersOfJack

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Still clearer to understand than applying for an entry level job that needs 5+ years experience.

    Reply

  32. Arklelinuke

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    This is what companies do when they want to put on the image of growth, but can’t actually afford to hire anyone.

    Reply

  33. eggumlaut

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Truth is this might be another example of tech companies faking the need for cheap H-1B employees.

    1. Post impossible requirements for job.
    2. Claim no US professionals can fill the need
    3. Hire H-1B employee
    4. Profit!

    It explains a lot of those entry level jobs with impossible requirements.

    Reply

  34. folation89

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Are you sure they aren’t referring to 8 years of listening to T-Swift?

    Reply

  35. 1OOO

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    This is why I became an IT manager, to end shit like this.

    Reply

  36. dinvasion

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    Literally just yesterday I saw a listing that was looking for someone with 5 years of ReactJS experience.. Reacts FIRST release (which was shit IMO) was in March of 2013, and it really didn’t get decent exposure and use until 2014.

    Reply

  37. Geoclasm

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    postings like this stir my inner troll.

    They make me want to submit an application with work experience like “Forensic Astronomy” and “Bio-computer engineering”.

    And then if they ask about it you say “Well, the particulars are classified. Top level stuff, but what we did was on the bleeding edge. Trust me, it would blow your mind out the back of your head if I could tell you about it.”

    Reply

  38. infreq

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    You can have 8 years of experience if you have plenty overtime.

    Reply

  39. ryderpavement

    August 23, 2017 at 9:13 pm

    This fake job so they can recruit more asians at half the money

    Reply

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